Any good EcoFeminist knows that it's dangerous to create a dichotomy between the brain and body. For too many years the patriarchy has equated the masculine with thinking qualities and the feminine with the body and *baser*, more earthly things. They then used this dichotomy to justify wanton destruction of the natural world and the the subjugation women's bodies and minds. Blah, blah, blah dichotomies suck. Blah, blah, blah the brain and body are both beautiful. Thankfully because this is a blog there is no need for footnotes--just trust that I know a lot about this stuff.
OK with that for an introduction, I went running again today. My inner dialog went like this:
Brain: "thanks Body, for finally getting your act together."
Body:"You know what? Fuck you, Brain--you can't understand what I've been through and I'm doing this for me not for you just because you're all depressed and needing endorphins."
Brain: "Well this is hard for me too--I hate change! You aren't the only one suffering so stop feeling so sorry for yourself. You were never the superstar, anyway."
Body: "Why do you only love me when I'm skinny?"
Brain: "Oh shit, do we have to talk about this again?"
Uh. The point is that all of this is getting easier, but I'm still a freakin gimp.
Last night CL and Brandon took me to a Mudhen Rugby fundraiser--lube wrestling. Holy Moley I miss rugby. I miss the women who play. I miss the game. I miss getting hit. I miss hitting. I miss drinking beer like you've really freakin earned it. I miss flashing my boobs at my teammates and making really obscene gestures and the like. Next weekend is the rugby Alumni Game in Eugene. It couldn't come at a better time.
I feel like I'm at a good enough place mentally and physically that all of this stuff I had put "on hold" when I got sick is finally starting to... thaw out? Of course I have to be all cryptic about it because it involves people other than myself. So let's have a celebration for the fact that it's not all about Cancer and Me these days. Holler!
3 years ago